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Kindergarten Managing Frustration

2/25/2019

Dear Kindergarten Parents and Guardians,

This week, we are continuing our work recognizing and responding to feelings in our bodies. We are talking about the feeling "frustrated," and are brainstorming times at school when students might feel this way.

As part of this lesson, students are being given the opportunity to practice naming their feeling. They are using the following phrase:

Stop! I feel ___________.

This phrase encourages them to check in and name the feeling they are experiencing. This is an important first step to recognizing when they are experiencing a big feeling, and to begin to consider strategies to feel better.

You can practice this strategy at home. When your child is upset, encourage them to practice naming their feeling using the phrase "Stop, I feel ___________."

Thank you for supporting this important lesson.

Sincerely,

David Starr
School Counselor, Armstrong Elementary School
PH: 508-836-7760 . Email: starrd@westboroughk12.org

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First Grade I Feel Sentences

2/25/2019

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Dear First Grade Parents and Guardians,

This week, we are working on problem solving in K and 1 classes. The last time we met, students reviewed the importance of strategies like taking deep breaths and counting to help calm their body when they are angry or upset. For this lesson, students are starting to learn the words they can say to solve a problem. We are using a modified form of the I feel statement taught in second and third grade. It looks like this:

· I feel _________ when you ________.

Students watched videos of former Armstrong students acting out different problem situations and worked to brainstorm I feel sentences that might help solve the problems. They then wrote their own I feel sentences. By learning to verbalize their feelings and what is causing them to feel that way, our hope is to develop a problem solving foundation with our students that will continue to grow throughout the rest of their time at Armstrong and beyond.

You can use this language to help build your children’s problem solving skills at home as well. When your child has a problem, encourage them to try an I feel statement to help solve it.

Thank you for your help with this important lesson.

Sincerely,

David Starr
School Counselor, Armstrong Elementary School
PH: (508) 836-7760 Email: starrd@westboroughk12.org

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2nd, 3rd Grade Problem Solving

2/25/2019

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Dear 2nd and 3rd Grade Parents and Guardians,

Over the past couple of weeks, I have been working with 2nd and 3rd grade students on using words to solve conflicts. Here at Armstrong, we use a technique called an “I feel” statement. It is a strategy for verbalizing our feelings in a non-confrontational way. An “I feel” statement looks like this:

I feel __________ when you ____________. I would like you to ____________.

In the first blank, put the feeling you are experiencing.
In the second blank, put the action of the other person that has caused you to feel this way.
In the third blank, put what the other person can do differently to solve the problem.

Third grade students also talked about the role of the listener. When someone is angry or upset with us and uses an “I feel” statement, the most important thing we can do is show that we listened. This is even the case when we disagree with what they are saying. To show we heard them, 3rd grade students are being taught “You feel” statements. They look like this:

You feel _________ when I __________. You would like me to _____________.

As part of the lesson, students were asked to create “I feel” and “You feel” statements they could use in response to sample conflict situations. You can try this strategy at home. When your child is feeling angry, sad, or frustrated at a sibling or peer, encourage them to use “I feel” and “You feel” statements. We will continue to practice this strategy over the next few lessons.

Two important reminders:

An “I feel” statement is one tool a child can use to solve conflicts with peers. It will not solve 100% of their problems. If a child has worked hard to verbalize their feelings and is not experiencing success, this is often a great time for an adult to step in and help.
The more neutral their tone of voice, the better chance the strategy will work. We have already talked about using relaxation strategies (taking deep breathes, counting, thinking of something that makes you especially happy) when you are upset. Using these, or even just walking away and waiting to solve the problem, can be helpful for calming your body down before talking to a friend or sibling.

Thank you for your help supporting this important lesson.

Sincerely,

David Starr
School Counselor, Armstrong Elementary School
PH: (508) 836-7760 Email: starrd@westboroughk12.org

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Kindergarten Managing Frustration

First Grade I Feel Sentences

2nd, 3rd Grade Problem Solving

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